Whod you bang
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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