I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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