I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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