I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize