I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize