I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
The feeling are messing with the penis
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
