his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
