You were right. It hurts to walk today.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Everything about him screamed your future.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
