Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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