Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
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