Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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