she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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