hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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