He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Holy sore nipples Batman
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
