Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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