But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
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