Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
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