To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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