I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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