It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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