there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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