Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize
