all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
