you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
