I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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