Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
