Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Duck Duck Cougar?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
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