I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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