I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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