i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
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It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
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Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
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