do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
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he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
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Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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