I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
