New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
