On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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