the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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