What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize