your thong is hanging out like whoa
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
