I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize