I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
That accounts for only three of the penises
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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