she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
My vagina is very pro this idea
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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