I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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