you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
