so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Slut skills are useful in every country.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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