For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
