im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
