he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
ugly people sure do ruin things
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize