You're so nebulous sometimes
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
