Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
please come you make the beer taste better
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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