Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize