spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
